heels: strong, stable, rooted
toes: active, itchy, grasping

living in the head is the ultimate arrogance – it cuts you off from everything

ultimately, am I going to accept the need for wandering, for a universality that partly dissolves my singularity?

this time of year (now everything is green) arab and druze patiently forage for herbs on verges

we can't stoop so low

in taiji everything starts in the feet rather than head

cavalier with the "truth"

don't let the bastards get you down or pin you down

I slept and dreamed that life was beauty
I woke and found that life was duty

if the work doesn't excite your spirit then it's doing more harm than good

the spirit should be excited but internally gathered

erase personal history by telling everyone different stories

an intimate exteriority

life will soften (bring wisdom) if lived right

a subject is not merely “in” a world, but enacts the torsion through which one world transforms into another

the only things we hold sacred nowadays are freedom of choice and anxiety

and too short-sighted to realise that they amount to the same thing

the force of gravity becomes an energy when we relax and let it into our bodies – when we own it – when we personalise it – when we internalise it

real simplicity can only be approached through a state of privation

everything we do is tempered by dr chi's admonition: natural way best way

what quality of mind allows mistakes to correct naturally?

that which we call thought must be disarmed

when things are running smoothly nothing is happening and you are stuck

significant because unorthodox

reality is in the struggle – the suffering

you can't trick the dao but the dao can easily trick you

and you must let it otherwise you won't progress

now is a stranger to consciousness

miracles are events of spirit

they should be our currency

relaxation is an expansion – just how big can your mind get?

only by relaxing into your full weight do you become weightless

despite your best efforts (because of your best efforts) you will not make internal progress

internal progress is marked by disruptions to your flow – reality irrupting the bubble of self

the essential claim of the sublime is that man can, in feeling and speech, transcend the human

in the eyes of the taiji community i'm an obsessive heretic who long ago veered from the path of orthodoxy

a sign that i may possibly have hit upon truth

many are called but few are chosen

the bourgeoisie is a class of upstarts

about some things you have no choice

if the work is one of them then you are truly blessed

A subject is an individual who has been seized by an event and finds new orientation by participating in the collective work of producing a truth.

don't be a chooser
be chosen
one of the very few

depression is lack of hope

mind quieting
quiet minding

modern comforts are bad for the spirit

A truth is something we do that brings something new into the world – something heterodox, that cannot be parsed in the categories of accepted knowledge.

in the world, creatively and creatingly

the teacher opens your mind and heart

then it's up to you

go for it

a prayerful mind invites divine influence
a worrying mind invites diabolic influence

                 I made myself homeless
on purpose for this shinnying up the silence

let yourself be drawn into the reality of the other
like being drawn into a strange novel or movie

if you're not willing to suspend disbelief then you may as well not bother

the important things you can't be judicious about

worry is what happens when the mind closes and loops uncontrollably

every now and then you manage to touch things you haven't the strength to bear and they will hurt or injure

slip them onto the back burner – save them for later

we need sometimes to escape into open solitudes, into aimlessness

progress depends upon enthusiasm – spirit stretching your being to the point of almost breaking

risky business

the point of return is a soft response – a yielding

a root develops naturally when you start yielding to the earth

if you don't have patience for the strangeness of a poem then how will you ever have the patience for the strangeness of another person?

noiselessness is tumultuous in its oceanic sense

first and foremost taiji is about yielding – waking up to and accommodating the other

the work is always paring

reduce your footprint

bend (the legs) under pressure (of gravity)

pounce upon the forgotten butterfly of revelation

tread softly: feet kissing earth, legs giving (way), heart respectful

wherever you find yourself you are always a guest

give: yield somewhat, as to influence or force

yield: meet the straight with a bending and turning

Prayer is not a substitute for work; it is an effort to work further and be efficient beyond the range of one's powers.

yield: defuse hardness with softness

the work is always pending

practice what you preach

psychotherapy is wishful thinking

minute after minute, watch your step closely

real softness is always hard won

relax the world in

tense shoulders are made of worry

without that quiet core you have no absolute, everything is relative, and you are totally reliant on context, on a value system

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.

in meditation a stiff tense body usually contains a busy unsettled mind

when the mind is still then the body can relax and fill with energy

the good die young – their life literally one of self-sacrifice, wearing themselves out in service

if things ain't looking up it's the least you can do

when you start a meditation session the ego will suddenly remember lots of things you should be doing instead

Art is always an energy exchange.

if private practice is your bread and butter then working with others is a piece of cake

ego is like a spoilt pampered brat – best ignored

if you ask someone's advice and don't take it then you are effectively snubbing them and they will be less likely to be free with advice next time you ask

on waking i always need a rest from the disturbing mental activity called sleep so i sit

The soul is awakened through service.

the honesty to know what action is best and the courage to take it

meditation: the jaded cynicism falls away to reveal an innocence

nothing is as trustworthy as the earth beneath your feet

Practice is work you do alone – in private. It is not about having experiences or about how you feel but about doing your duty. Honourably fulfilling your side of a bargain you have made – maybe unknowingly, probably unspokenly – with the Dao.

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said.

for a culture that prides itself on its enlightened values, we have an extremely unenlightened attitude to death

give the work a chance – commit

sitting cross-legged, with vertical spine, quiet mind, uplifted spirit, turns the body into an orgone accumulator

we tell ourselves what we want to believe and this has nothing to do with any objective truth and everything to do with protecting and promoting the ego

The supreme triumph of reason is to cast doubt upon its own validity.

live with comfort, safety and convenience as the centre of existence and you will get weaker

let the world rip you out of yourself

we are insulated from earth with a thick layer of guilt

We have been slave to the ego since before we remember. We have grown up reliant upon its inner support, and we can't let it go until we have developed something to take its place – a strong rooted body, a quiet humble mind and the ability to yield. To break free we must enslave ourselves to the work.

When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.

any athlete will tell you: the only way to get stronger is to endure greater difficulty

kill the guru

dao that can be thought is not dao

If you want the work to change you then you must make yourself do it. To begin with this is with a mind that understands the value of discipline – that has experience of doing things it doesn't necessarily want to do. But eventually the work kindles an inner fire, and then you can't not do it. This state we call being in love with taiji.

this is the way of heaven and i try not to forget

cultivate spirit and laugh at ego

bourgeois: aristocratic pretensions without the aristos

meditation: soul food

a church is an instrument designed to gather together the devotional energy of a community and beam it up to heaven

The sun shines not on us but in us.

the bourgeoisie hate to get their hands dirty

down & out

let the work wear you down

a life devoted to achieving inner silence—to meeting god

a permanent state of transition is man's most noble condition

everything in our artificial lives insulates the ego from natural forces of erosion

how dare you?

people no longer die, they fizzle out

earth will drain away anxiety
and mind will quieten naturally
but only if you let it

this is the value of mindfulness

speak more as a poet than as a person

Progress in this game takes work. A lot of work. Not necessarily hard work but certainly courageous work. Looking into aspects of self we spend our lives pretending aren't there—conveniently brushing them under the carpet. The past will definitely come back to haunt so best face it whilst you have the strength. Before it's too late.

desire inner silence—peace—more than anything
then you'll find it

meditation transports one from the actual to the virtual

poetry uses language to evoke the internal

if you are not failing you are not pushing yourself

relax and let nature do her work

force it and it'll end in tears

taiji turns me on

meditation: feet, hands, dantien all together

let everything fall away to reveal inner silence

only then will it begin to make sense

you must love anything you must do

it all starts with desire – an ache for the stars

get down & dirty

we know how to look but we've forgotten how to see

continuum: a set of elements such that between any two there is a third

                        I’ll sit
until the last patch of snow
dissolves into stone.

this seventh decade is the time of heart

we now have the sobriety, humility and compassion to look into the heart

the simplest thing last of all

a good student completes the teaching

ego holds you back – prevents you growing up – forever a fledgling heart and soul

only when the world loses its appeal will the student venture into heart

this is why practice—in its external nature—is repetitive and boring: its very tediousness drives you into the internal

awake in what language lacks

when i use the words imaginary and imagination i mean of the reality of the heart rather than the mind

a true mantram voices itself within the heart

 

smog of self smothers inner vision

working with the internal inevitably exposes and externalises it to some degree

this is why the internal always seems to be changing – you're digging deeper each time you work

Two-way sex-conditioned spirals are the consummate individuals of all Creation.

have you noticed that now ukraine is in the news covid19 has disappeared?

most organisations and institutions are corrupt because they must create a demand for their services

the internal cannot be explained or described, only hinted at – whisperings

when you begin to intuit the equivalence of heart and mind then you're getting somewhere

desire: the way the earth desires the body (gravity) and the way the heavens desire the spirit (levity)

the keystone of the entire structure of the spiritual and physical universe is rhythmic balanced interchange between all opposites

a tithe of time : devote a tenth of each day to the work

dwell long upon

in walking i relax back into a body that moves me forward

you are not your body 

your body contains you 

but the body is the only thing you really possess so take care of it

Social media is designed to manufacture the three cons: conflict, conformity and consumption.

as the decades roll by it gradually becomes apparent that daily practice is the only real part of you, and you better not, dare not, cannot miss a day for fear of damaging your destiny

daily practice slowly draws you into heart

destiny is connexion to the cosmos : it is out of time

an internal teaching must be taken on faith : you either feel it or you don't

an argumentative student is still locked in the external and is not ready for the internal

they will of course argue with this assessment

All sense of depression is really man’s being torn away from the true world, his being no longer a microcosm, his captivity to the “given world,” his slavery to necessity.

it's not the things you enjoy that make you a better person but how you deal with the difficult things

we make our world in our own image

lean back into your own embrace

good energy comes our way as gift but only when we are gracious enough to receive it well – treasure it

there is a vibrancy to silence

the only thing i've ever wanted was something thick and juicy i could sink my teeth into and spend the rest of my days gnawing away at

so you see i'm very lucky – a dog with a bone

reduced to silence / reduced to essence

internal work makes the familiar unfamiliar

in a way your root is the passion that escapes you

built up and then honed down

feel unbearably out of sorts after practice? 

take a shower

internal work unsettles

that special joy in doing your duty and doing it well

next time you are taken by surprise and your defences drop pay attention because that is when you encounter reality and that is when the world encounters the real you

“God” is one of the pseudonyms of “the Real”

meditation gives an experience of something deeper than the self

progress is assured when you can no longer live with your self

strange how disciplined hard work leads to softness

relax into work until you forget self, then the passion is rekindled and you won't want to stop

the way an animal must leave its lair to feed, so must we leave the safety of self to practice

practice is food for the soul

I do it without knowing how I do it.

the secret to practice : make the time and never miss a day

be honest : if there's something else you'd rather be doing then do it

root is not just your energy sinking into earth but earth's energy rising into you

you bleed into each other and this is softness

you know the phrase 'pull yourself together'? 

relaxation is the opposite : let go and sway

solemnity of tone and a kind of sanctifying of passion

practice slips into mere going-through-the-motions unless we REALLY work at it

root develops when we learn to trust the earth

connecting to earth through legs and feet is only the half of rooting

the other half is letting the spine/heart behave as an antenna communicating with the cosmos

you know that feeling when you're meditating and if only you could let go a fraction more the heart would open for good and the spirit would fly upward and that would be it?

hearing in the sense of hearkening and heeding is a transposition of hearing proper into the realm of the spiritual

faith connects us to a source 

hope to a destination or future 

and love to a giving present

all a-tremble

we think our godless human universe so large and rich and true, yet it is smaller, poorer and falser than it has ever been – suffocating

the noisy mind is largely worry and anxiety – a closed masturbatory loop 

open it up and reach far beyond the self

One way of looking at paradox is as an indicator that we are dealing with two apparently valid world-pictures which yet do not concur.

ego – like most of our maladies – is largely a circulation problem

spirit is a natural instrument of critique

it cuts through everything divisible

spirit of vitality – the life force — élan vital

The mysterious aspect of the teaching is what is known as The Transmission. An injection of spirit from the teacher which awakens and rewilds your spirit. It means that a tiny but significant part of you is no longer domesticated or broken. With practice this seed grows and slowly takes over. Consumed by the gentle fire of an untrammelled spirit.

One can think of romanticism as the discovery that the everyday is an exceptional achievement.

a certain energy can only be produced

in conditions where people work together

reciprocity is the golden rule

if you desire to get back to nature (and who doesn't) then work on spirit

it's the only part of us remotely natural

beginner's mind is innocent, enthusiastic, eager, apprehensive, and above all, uncritical – it lacks experience against which to measure and judge so it swallows everything the teacher says

the ordinary is precisely not what is obvious, but rather that which passes in the normal run of things unnoticed and untouched, though it sits in plain view before us