30 May 2013
When you write on a regular basis what becomes apparent is the absolute impossibility of saying anything that is intrinsically true. The truth remains ever illusive, just out of grasp, always slipping away or changing shape. Then what's written, although eloquent and with beauty, fails and is thrown into the proverbial garbage can. As someone once said: the excrementa of the creative process. It then becomes clear that truth is in the process, not in what that process actualizes.
Nothing could be better than what is. There is no alternative to the lesson of this passing moment. The only choice I have is whether to learn or not. If I chose not then even though life presents another, I still waste time – the cardinal sin. And remember that the most common way of wasting time is to fill it with nonsense – to give the appearance of industry – a deceptive ploy we call avoidance.
The energy that drives you when young is exactly that which holds you back when old. This is why it is so important to undergo transformation on all levels. Youthful energy is neurosis sublimated – how can it be anything else given that youth is heavily conditioned? It is energy externalized, directed by the funnel and focus of ego at arbitrary targets, when the only valid target is the ego itself. The gun cannot fire at itself. Even when it backfires it just ends up injuring he who wields it. The freedom we strive for is not the freedom to get what we desire, but the freedom from desire, the freedom not just from want but from need too. Because ultimately all desire stems from a pathetic need to be loved. This is what a believer understands. For a believer the first fact is that God loves him, and then a life of faith is simply a life spent submerging oneself in that fact until it has become so internalized there is no part that does not believe.
29 May 2013
For me, the best definition of taiji is Grand Master Yang Cheng-fu's (1883-1936).
He said taiji is the art of concealing hardness with softness.
The implication of this statement is that nothing is what it seems, and that everything contains but conceals its opposite.
Yin and Yang become each other at the deepest level.
Externally taiji is slow and calm and soft and relaxed, yet these qualities are only achieved with years of dedicated and disciplined practice.
It is said that the teaching plants the seed which practice waters, from which the art sprouts and in time flourishes.
Or, to change the image from vegetable to mineral: practice crystalizes and polishes the hard diamond at our core.
And one thing we learn from practice is that the image (visualization) changes all the time – a case of creative expediency giving the lie to the law of the excluded middle.
27 May 2013
In taiji you'll often find yourself thrust, by the teacher or the teaching, into energy worlds where everything feels strange and you no longer know yourself. Don't be alarmed – these are indications of progress. Just be patient and accepting – stay open – don't resist – yield – and you'll gradually acclimatise.
