31 March 2017
Spiritual work is about freeing the heart of the mundane. To achieve this we must first give something back, so we offer our body, our mass; we sink and relax. And the big secret is that the same relaxation that releases the body down also releases the spirit up, and that upward release is our first glimmer of God.
If you really want to learn, and you really want to change (do you, really?) then you should let your teacher's words haunt every practice session, and, if possible, every moment. They will anyway, subconsciously, but they'll also be resisted, tooth and nail, subconsciously. Success requires the battle to be brought out into the open.
30 March 2017
29 March 2017
The dantien needs to be worked, physically, muscularly, like any muscle, with impassioned sequences of belly contractions alternating with lumbar spine extensions – bowing then arching the spine – pelvic rocking. The passion, the intensity, comes from the connected continuity through the sequence rather than the force exterted, and so can be done anywhere at anytime: whilst walking, waiting, reading, even conversing. Driving is ideal because the exercise also improves posture (we all tend to slump as we drive, unless you have a good bucket seat) and brings the mind to attention, to a place of cold, quiet vigilance; a mood we call ruthless.
Mind in dantien, the instruction, the reality, (at) the core of our work and life. But not a useless, flaccid mind, wanting to wander, but an intense ruthless mind, a mind in tension, a mind that tones the body so that body can effectively obey the mind. Then mind and body are unified in tension, in an intensity we call spirit.
27 March 2017
26 March 2017
23 March 2017
Simply put we have two aspects. We have surface self represented by ego and we have deep soul represented by spirit. For most of us the former dominates, especially on the day to day. Spiritual work is any activity that aims to weaken ego and strengthen spirit so that the soul can, at least for a little time, be acknowledged and put to the fore.
21 March 2017
"Taiji is not difficult, it is impossible."
Spirit makes the impossible possible. When spirit rises it is as though a light has been switched on, and suddenly you can see, and it's all rather straightforward and easy. But without that light everything is a real struggle. A poor teacher demonstrates externals. A good teacher helps you find the switch.
Spirit makes the impossible possible. When spirit rises it is as though a light has been switched on, and suddenly you can see, and it's all rather straightforward and easy. But without that light everything is a real struggle. A poor teacher demonstrates externals. A good teacher helps you find the switch.
Love for God is simply the very natural tendency of spirit to lift upward, like a vapour rising from the chest, the heart. God's love for us is simply the very natural draw from above, from outside, from the Other, a constant call to our spirit to acknowledge, lift and love. Two sides of the same coin.
Don't you find it irritating when someone asks, "What are the benefits of Taiji?" I used to waffle on about relaxation and health and strength, not believing a word of it myself, but now I usually answer, "It makes the world a better place," or, if I want to get my own back and be really irritating in turn I say, "It keeps God happy." Then the response is, of course, "No, I mean what are the benefits for ME." End of story.
I have a student here, a psychotherapist, who insists that most peoples' problems stem from an inability to spend time alone – a fear of loneliness. And I think I agree. Yet her idea of being alone is to spend an evening sitting in front of the TV pigging out on a large tub of ice-cream, so I guess there are degrees of alone. Meditation is, if you like, pure alone time – solitude without even your thoughts for company; time spent listening to what tentatively emerges from the shadows when we are, truly, alone.
20 March 2017
19 March 2017
18 March 2017
The work aims to wrest control from head to heart. Not really control, more like organizing principle. The heart embraces differences, like a benevolent parent who loves regardless of the child's erratic behavior, whereas the head is like a little tinpot dictator trying to force things into the same mould.
Spiritual work aims to break mind out of the boundaries of self – out of thought – and into/onto a plane of extension/extensity/extensivity we call the divine. In Taiji we manage this by training legs/dantien to grab the ground with animal intensity, thereby supplying the heart with a steady stream of spirit which, with our vertical spine, we whip upward rather than outward, breaking free of Earth's gravity and extending joyfully to God, maybe. Simple really, just difficult to do, and its getting more and more difficult the more our culture weakens its individuals by encouraging them to rely on its crutches of money, morality and medicine.
17 March 2017
We are never alone. Solitude is simply a time we eschew the living – the noise of life – for the company of the dead. A quire of saints – those who have previously trodden the path and who accompany us every step of the way, guiding, protecting, encouraging, enthusing. One day you will be one such, given the courage to persevere.
16 March 2017
Of all the people on the planet, those with the best balance, with the most well-defined dantiens, are the surfers, the boarders, and their ilk, and the reason they have fantastic balance is because they insistently search for more and more difficult waves to ride, waves that demand a level of spirit that would, at the very least, paralyse the average person. And the only reason they improve is because they are not only willing to fail, they expect failure, they welcome and invite failure because they know that this is the only way. Investing in loss.
The dominant fact of the human being is range. Not only the ability to roam enormous energetic distance but the drive to do so. Nomadism. Each dwelling, each moment, each emotion, preparation for an impending movement, for change. So Yin & Yang – Taoism – is human experience imprinted on reality, rather than vice versa, and it is this that makes it a workable model.
15 March 2017
Here we are, caught at a crossroads, an evolutionary conundrum. We have managed the miraculous: dredged ourselves up from claustrophobic animal intensity (inclined spine) into serene angelic extensity (vertical spine) but by doing so have lost our source of power – the very muscles and ground that maintained our previous inclination and the spirit that inclination demanded. Hence depression, consumerism, secular pride, stupidity, and all the other modern malaises. If we wish to escape this trap then we'll need to work with an image of man that only our hearts can concoct. Our own Zarathustra. And in this sense our work on ourselves sets the scene, programs the future possibilities of man.
Softness comes into the heart, in time, if we allow life to wear down our hardness, pierce the shell of civilized comforts we work so hard to surround ourselves with, comforts we pray will keep us from ever needing to look at anything uncomfortable or painful or disturbing or real. Then the first act of the soft heart is forgiveness, forgiving the pain, indeed thanking the pain for waking us up, and the real journey begins. In this sense, even the most advanced is merely preparing to begin.
Personal power and charisma, like intelligence, talent and good looks, are wonderful qualities to possess but have absolutely no bearing on spiritual level. And they become a real curse, when the time comes, as it inevitably will, when you begin to realize that they're not only holding you back but destroying you.
14 March 2017
13 March 2017
Daily solitary practice is our little sacrifice. The sacrifice of valuable time, time that could be spent playing with your dick, in order to suffer for the soul. And this is the point here: practice is not pleasurable, not fun, not enjoyable. Most of the time it is downright difficult and grim, but the good student gets on with it anyway, by not allowing themselves a choice. Nowadays everyone is spoilt for choice.
When Jesus instructed those listening to give their wealth to the poor and needy I suspect he wasn't really interested in helping the poor – the chances are they'd only spend it on drugs or the lottery anyway – but in cleansing and preparing the souls of those he was instructing. Any new journey of significance starts with a sacrifice, and the greater the sacrifice the higher the chance that the journey will bring about real transformation.
12 March 2017
Have you noticed how people don't really think anymore, they just have opinions? Thinking, be it for oneself or against the self, against the State, seems to be a lost art. People are no longer prepared to live a different life to the one society presents them with. The liberal left are especially guilty of this hypocrisy – railing against injustice and poverty, sneering indignantly at Donald Trump, yet all the while enjoying the excesses of a middle-class lifestyle, which can only exist because the lower-classes don't have it.
11 March 2017
Our main tool of de-intensification is language. We use words to label, to generalise, to categorise, to tidy up the world and force it into a scheme, a scheme of things. And then, in the safety of our own boudoir, we attempt to re-intensify that scheme by writing poems, elegies and laments to the loss of grace posing as paeans to human insight. Intense utterances are only ever grunts and groans, with the occasional scream thrown in when things get really intense. Think of sex, not to become aroused, but to do things better.
When you look at it, and the only way to move on is by looking at it, seeing the truth of the situation, the only reason we don't engage fully with things, with the intensity we are capable of when at our best, is self-pity: the awful, lingering slackness of indulged reflection, simply for the sake of justifying our own weakness, laziness. I agree totally with the Hasidim: our first responsibility to God, and therefore to our own spirit, our own better self, is to be happy, and this means to let out a constant stream of intense energy, engaging the immediate in a grip of power and transformation. As my teacher used to say: You are always at least 50% responsible for every situation you find yourself in. So just make sure that 50% is your best.
The exercises of this art are designed to bring energetic and spiritual transformation. But to achieve this the secret of each exercise must be known. A secret is like a visualisation or a state of mind or, perhaps more accurately, a configuration of spirit. And remember, the best secrets, the real secrets, are secret because they can't be told, they have to be found out for oneself.
Once, when I was a kid, my father explained how to tell the difference between the cold tap and the hot tap when they're not labelled. The cold usually comes straight from the mains so has high mains pressure whereas the hot is usually from a cistern in the attic so has the low pressure of a head of water. So just test the pressure of each tap by trying to stem the flow with a finger, or simply by looking. What we want, energetically, is to tap into the fresh mains rather than develop a stagnant head.
10 March 2017
09 March 2017
"The money you pay me gets you through the front door and that is all. Now we need to strike a bargain. I am prepared to teach, if you are prepared to practice. And if you're not then I would prefer never to see you again."
John Kells
And it is, purely, a matter of preparation. We are constantly preparing ourselves to begin. And in this sense the reality we inhabit is messianic. There is always something – some Other – about to arrive which threatens to change (invert) everything. And it is this future, this dangerous prospect, this change of heart, which we work and pray for.
John Kells
And it is, purely, a matter of preparation. We are constantly preparing ourselves to begin. And in this sense the reality we inhabit is messianic. There is always something – some Other – about to arrive which threatens to change (invert) everything. And it is this future, this dangerous prospect, this change of heart, which we work and pray for.
Only on two occasions did I ever mention feelings to my teacher. The first time I told him that I had just felt 'energy.' He was faintly amused by my excitement and said, "Welcome to the human race!" The second time he was less charitable. I told him that I had felt my head suspended from above for an entire Form, to which he replied, "What do you want from me, a fucking medal?" I then realised that feelings of this sort were entirely my own business, to be worked with privately, and that they had no bearing on either my character or my progress. They simply indicated that I had done a little, though not enough, work.
08 March 2017
Back in the early eighties, just before I started Taiji, I visited an osteopath for a bad back. He had recently completed a course on craniosacral therapy and prosperity consciousness, and fancied himself as a bit of a New Age guru. He instructed me to compile a list of the ten things I most wanted in life. "Like what?" I asked. "Like a great well-paid job, a beautiful girlfriend, a nice apartment in Islington… But don't be greedy…" I found the whole exercise rather distasteful and childish but I completed it. "Now, each evening read through the list aloud ten times, and the energy of the Universe will bring those things to you." I only had to do this once to realise that it was an exercise in pure selfishness, with zero spiritual content. Then I thought, maybe instead of wishing for these things I should wish for a mind that no longer wanted such trivia. And then I realised that what I most wanted in life was not things, not material possessions, but a destiny, a direction, a lifelong course of work and devotion that would consume me until it eventually killed me. A couple of weeks later I met John Kells. So, I guess, in its way, the exercise worked.
07 March 2017
"If a student tries to use me then I shall use them back unmercifully." (John Kells)
This is, actually, unavoidable, because the last thing the master is prepared to do is waste either time or energy. And this statement shows how great teachers always speak in principle. Even at their most personal and idiosyncratic (psychotic), their utterances easily generalize up and into each person present. Any form of abuse or misuse will eventually backfire.
This is, actually, unavoidable, because the last thing the master is prepared to do is waste either time or energy. And this statement shows how great teachers always speak in principle. Even at their most personal and idiosyncratic (psychotic), their utterances easily generalize up and into each person present. Any form of abuse or misuse will eventually backfire.
05 March 2017
The big secret of Taoism can be summed up in one phrase: Lightness comes from heaviness. Lightness does not engender more lightness. It either disappears altogether or it starts to condense, becomes heavy, falls. There are no states, only stages of transition. Even enlightenment, I suspect, which always seems a little puerile as a concept – a cozy destination – an end in sight – is subject to decay and corruption. The enlightened master doesn't sit upon his throne spouting spiritual platitudes but works the garden, sweeps the floor, cooks the food, not out of magnanimous selflessness but out of absolute necessity.
Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. This is not just a sentimental platitude but a general law. A principle. Yin and Yang. Those at the bottom can only rise up; those at the top can only sink down. And all the while the middle-class cringe in their affluent bubbles, living long lives yet never growing up, in the pathetically vain hope that they and their progeny will remain forever in the middle.
04 March 2017
The ego, especially the superego, hates to be mocked, to be laughed at, to be made fun of. It gets angry, then turns to all manner of external standard to justify its indignation. So, as a simple spiritual exercise, start laughing at yourself, poking fun, being a little silly, inconsistent, contradictory. And enjoy the upset it causes, to your self and to those around you.
03 March 2017
02 March 2017
01 March 2017
Spiritual work, when stripped of religious undertones and New Age overtones, is simply the investigation of mind. Mind is a space, or a medium, into which flow all sorts of phenomena: especially, for the average person, thoughts and feelings. When we latch onto these thoughts and feelings (remain average) then they become worries and emotions – obstructions in mind and obstacles to peace. When we detach from thoughts and feelings – allow them to arise and allow them to pass – then we enter and permeate the space into which they venture or, rather, that space enters us. Spiritual work starts, always, with relaxing our mind of worries and emotions – gaining some control of self-indulgence – so that we can commence the amazing journey into true mind, which is never really our own, but rather a general universal space, available to all, on/in a very different dimension to that of the observable physical world. Without first quietening the mind and accessing the inner peace that our internal chatter smothers then higher levels on the spiritual path are simply inaccessible.
Can't see the wood for the trees.
The beauty of this phrase lies in the word wood, which denotes both a large collection of trees, and the material from which each tree is made. So the adage is warning of the danger of being unwilling to either step back and see context or step in and see content – basically the danger in staying where you are.
The beauty of this phrase lies in the word wood, which denotes both a large collection of trees, and the material from which each tree is made. So the adage is warning of the danger of being unwilling to either step back and see context or step in and see content – basically the danger in staying where you are.
The Bourgeois Fallacy
I was emailed yesterday with a request for the complete Bourgeois Fallacy, or what could be called A Bourgeois Manifesto – a set of flippant observations I made some time ago. A Manifesto of Spirit could be compiled simply by reversing each of the below – Freedom is freedom from choice; I am entitled to absolutely nothing; Death, pain and suffering are the best teachers; etc.
- Freedom is freedom of choice.
- I am entitled to the best of all worlds.
- Death, pain and suffering are best avoided.
- Propriety (property) is preferable to passion (spirit).
- Time is always reversible (it's never too late).
- The unknowable does not exist.
- Depression is preferable to madness.
- Talking makes things better.
- Consume and conform and everything will be OK.
- Society is necessarily stratified, with me in the middle: neither menial nor responsible.
- There's always someone else to blame.
- Wealth and health are the path to salvation.
- Thinking is the path to truth.
- Standard of living determines quality of life.
- Everything of value is quantifiable (money can buy you love).